I couldn’t sleep last night.
This doesn’t happen often.
I have too many ideas
and not enough to show for my thoughts.
The endless possibilities of this year’s final dark moon was calling.
I am awake and listening.
In a world where anything is possible,
I can’t seem to hold on to the best of me and let it shine.
I don’t need fame
just the ability to sleep at night knowing my creative endeavors
From my energetic and spiritual perspective, any pursuit made from the heart is worthy,
regardless of who knows.
This year I have been working with courage.
Not the absence of fear,
yet the presence of unflinching faith in vulnerability.
Saying yes more to the deepest parts of me
and saying no to the illusions that only ever served as a reminder of the distant truth.
I believe our work is what’s in front of us.
Its what we resist the most.
Moving through resistance brings great transformation.
But not when you white knuckle it.
You can’t move into a a state of real change kicking and screaming.
There has to be a sense of allowing and letting go.
Of losing yourself.
The regrets of the past
and the story of the future.
The constructs that have scared you into believing
you need to be different
and you’re not enough.
“If you had
Or one opportunity
To seize everything you ever wanted
In one moment
Would you capture it
Or just let it slip?” (Eminem, 2002)
I want to believe I would throw myself wildly into the unknown of this moment.
The reality is,
it’s not just one moment.
Every single moment holds this opportunity.
To go deep,
past the veil,
through the shadows and flames.
To lose yourself
and to find what you’ve become
wasn’t so scary after all.
It was you.