What Is Mind Body Coaching and how can it change the world?

Coaching is an evolutionary approach to managing and taking responsibility for your life. 

Mind Body Coaching is that, plus a celebration in the living part of life. Looking at all of life, the ups and downs,  as a ritual that is sacred and meaningful. 

Where therapy helps you process the past and what has happened, coaching allows you to celebrate the present, what is truly available to you now,  and consider what is possible for the future.  

Traditional methods of therapy and counseling can work hand in hand with 1:1 coaching, giving individuals, especially those who have experienced major trauma, a wrap around system of support for recovery and resilience. 

You don't have to be in therapy to be in coaching, but they can work in harmony, beautifully. 

Coaching is about mindset. When I say it’s evolutionary, I mean it’s using the mind as your number one tool for creating growth and change. 

There are things in life, circumstances, that we do not have control over, but the one things we can always control is how we THINK. The thoughts we choose are always ours to pick.  

This process of thinking on purpose or mindful thinking,  takes work, practice and awareness,  but will change your life in amazing ways. 

When we being to think in alignment with the results we want in our lives, our emotions and actions fall into place with creating those results. 

A basic example of something that affects everyone is the weather. This is a circumstance, a fact we do not have control over no matter how hard we try.  Here’s how a scenario could play out in thoughts: (if you write your thoughts down, you will be shocked at the kind of thoughts that shows up. )

“Oh man, it’s been raining for days, this sucks, I haven’t been able to go on my walk in a week. My exercise routine is going to suffer and I’ll back to square one. ”  This persons thoughts that the rain sucks create an emotion of being disappointed.  In turn, the feelings produce inaction of not getting out and taking a daily walk and the results are more lethargy, less endorphins and not prioritizing their exercise. 

Now, there are a couple ways this could go…This is where the mindful thinking and the celebratory part of Mind Body Coaching comes in.

“Looks like there’s no end in sight for this rain to stop, I better get  bundled up and embrace all that nature has to offer. My kids love to splash in puddles, that could make things more fun.”  OR “I guess another rainy day means I need to figure out how to get my exercise in if it’s a priority.  This is a great opportunity to try that yoga video I have been putting off. “

Here you can see how these thoughts will produce a better and more desired emotional response, action and result. 

The trick is, you have to be aware that thinking is a choice. So much of what we do is on auto pilot because of repetition, it seems as though we don’t have a choice of how to respond because we have conditioned our own beliefs.  If beliefs are just thoughts you think again and again, then we have the capacity to believe anything we want if we change our thoughts accordingly. 

There are countless thoughts available to us.  Why we default to pick the worst case scenario much of the time,  is based on what our brains were used for when our survival was constantly threatened.  

However, we no longer need to live in fight or flight mode. Practicing thinking on purpose with believable thoughts is an exercise in free will. 

Beyond getting to the root of the thoughts we are thinking, Mind Body Coaching offers you tools to make the process of thinking on purpose easier, enjoyable and creating an overall more satisfying life.  This isn’t a practice to white knuckle through, it’s process of softening our rigidity to change and embracing the fact that we too are of the earth and require attention to the changing rhythms of our life and cycles of our journey. 

As humans in a wester culture, we are in GO mode constantly, never powering down when our batteries are running low.  We treat ourselves like the technology we think we can’t live without, instead of the beings of nature that we are. We don’t slow down to look at the inner workings, the uniqueness of our truest essence.  This creates disease,  imbalance and a general dissatisfaction for how we think we “should” live our lives, rather than the “musts” we need to feed our souls. 

The concepts of Mind Body Coaching are pretty straight forward, but you have to be willing to put in time as collateral for your mental health. 

We spend 10’s of 1000’s of dollars on the care and health for our homes, bodies, cars and even lawn, but we invest little to no money or time on our mental health. The one thing that will create a life and future of abundance and ultimately more world peace.   This way of investing in our future is starting to be prioritized little by little, but is so important for the welfare of our societies, children and the world at large. When we find more inner peace, we shift how we respond to others. I truly believe this is how we make big change.  Taking responsibility for our own thoughts, feelings and actions and empowering future generations to do the same. We are not victims of circumstance, we are agents of free will and hero’s of our own story. 

Mind Body Coaching is my heartfelt expression of how I want to be in the world; fully present and creating sacred space where others can find comfort in their vulnerability. It is the essence of my life intention which informs all I think and do. It is the work I have been called to do after 20 years and many hours of study and self inquiry. I want you to know your expression matters, your creativity is divine and there is room for you here. Let's talk about how all of your dreams can come true and how to turn your problems into power. If you are interested in how coaching can change your life, let’s talk! To signup for a free heart to heart mini session, email me mary@yogafiedsoul.com

In the mean time please check out my blog for everyday ritual prompts, free coaching videos + classes you can do in your own home.  www.yogafiedsoul.com

With the highest regard, 

Mary Wagstaff

There's room for you here.

What would it feel like if…

You walked into a crowded room and a stranger caught your eye,

started waving their hand saying, come over, pull up a chair, it’s so great to meet you?

You’re rolling up your mat at a yoga studio you have been to a dozen times and the teacher comes over

and says, I am so glad you are part of our community?

During a visit with your general practitioner, they hear your feed back about what is present for you in your mind, body and soul and say,

wow, your insight is amazing, you really have a wonderful sense of self?

You reach for the phone to call your lover to tell them about an upsetting interaction you just had with your Mother

and in that exact moment, they call you and say you are perfect no matter what happens in this life?

In my mind, I would feel held, loved and supported.

I would know someone cared unconditionally and the past flaws and failures didn’t matter any more,

in fact, they never did. I would know I was valid and important.

I would have an unflinching faith in myself that I can accomplish anything I choose,

in fact, I may even be the one to create the new paradigm to follow

for how to create success through joy.

But I would also think that I needed the approval of others to feel

Now, how would you feel if….

You walked into a party of strangers and sat down by the first person that looked interesting and asked how their day was going?

After yoga class you sat for an extra 10 minutes to meditate on expanding your personal energy to source energy so you may be a vessel of attracting abundance.

You start paying attention to and making notes on the phase of the moon during specific times of year

and how your mind, body and soul respond on physical and energetic levels. You don’t rush to google symptoms, you simply refer to your notes, have a

cup of tea and know you just need to rest today.

After an upsetting call with your Mother you sit quietly and repeat the mantra: breathe, relax, feel, watch, allow. You watch as your emotions move like a

wave with a beginning, middle and end. You feel lighter with a greater understanding that another persons actions are not personal, and that you are

control of all of your emotions.

For me, I would feel empowered, confident and in control.

I would feel expansive with less judgments to carry around about my self and others and more room to simply love.

In good times and bad, tough and easy, sickness and health, I would know that my being alive is the proof of my worthiness.

That I don’t need to look outside of my self for the answers to my truth.

That in love, relationships and community, I can take what resonates with me and leave the rest.

A kind ear, words of wisdom and a warm embrace are parts of our humanness that are priceless,

but there is no greater love than your two hands together in front of your heart.

You are your own best teacher, doctor, lover and friend.

Get selfish with yourself.

Take any seat at the table you want and pull out the chair for the next person to sit down right by you.

Know by your own right, you are enough.

Till death do you part, say I do.

There’s room for you here.

Renovating your mind.

Most people don’t know I own a residential remodeling company.

My role is limited, but I do cut tile, answer emails and review bids.

It’s amazing that people send 10’s of thousands of dollars to fix things that aren’t broken.

We take pride in keeping old homes beautiful and functioning, in restoration rather than demolishing,

but the aesthetic pleasure one gets from a newly tiled bathroom,

is fleeting, at best.

Remodeling in many ways is like coaching,

except managing your thoughts and mind,

will actually create real, long lasting pleasure and the skill to allow for all of life’s ups and downs.

When someone wants to remodel their bathroom they get excited.

They start dreaming about this new luxury.

They start Pinning things,

matching colors, tile, accessories.

By using their mind alone and thoughts, before the demo has even begun,

they are already experiencing more feelings of joy and satisfaction.

They make the plan,

save the money,

and hire a professional.

Together the clients and the contractor finalize practical designs, based on their needs and likes.

They get creative, negotiate a price

and get to work.

There is open communication throughout the process of obstacles and decisions that need to be made.

The clients have work they must do for the final product to be the result they want

and the contractor has to show up to fulfill the contract and hold space to keep the project flowing.

The bathroom is complete and beautiful beyond words.

The clients couldn’t believe that space they once loathed, could be so clean, tidy and almost therapeutic.

Showers are now a spiritual experience of self care and adoration.

However, time goes on, soap scum covers the new glass shower door

and the once sparkling grout begins to fade and look dull.

The luster had been lost and forgotten.

The couple has an argument and unspoken agreements about who is responsible for the maintenance of this

new luxury that was suppose to bring so much joy, taking all of their troubles away.

Debt from the project becomes a source of stress and one of the kids is failing at school.

The only things the shower now offers is a place to hide from the world,

but now it holds with it a gentle sting of the promise of a new day that ceased to deliver.

This tale starts to sound grim, but the point is,

life is 50/50, ups and downs ALWAYS.

No matter how expensive your tile is, or how much money you have,

or how few wrinkles you have or how much you weight, or how many flowers your lover buys you.

Until you invest in your mental health, there is not one thing you can change in your world that will take the sometimes subtle sting of life away.

You have to learn to create your own joy from your thoughts, and manage your sadness through a process of allowing.

Get creative.

Start Pinning the life you Think will make you happy

and start living like the person that already has all of those things.

If your thoughts about them can create a sense of joy,

your thoughts about all of your blessings now can too.

If you can’t quite hit the nail,

hire a professional to help you organize the project of renovating your mind.

My name is Mary Wagstaff, I am a mind body coach.

My mission is to keep the beauty and health of your wonderful mind that already exists

through love, appreciation and restoration, not demolition.

You’ll also save a ton a money in the later route to happiness.

When you find the happiness you seek inside, then lets’ talk tile.


How to make more time in your day, you'll be amazed.

Wasting time.

We all do it.

Not doing it takes practice.

Today was a snow day for my sons preschool,

it ended up being a snow day for me too.

If I worked full time, I would have embraced it.

But I only have two days a week that are my full work days.

Where I can created content, coach, teach and meet my accountability group,

without having to hide in the other room,

or compromise my parenting choices.

For whatever reason, since I began paying rent for an actual office space one day a week outside of my house, on Tuesdays,

there has been one reason or another why I have had to stay home with my son.

When I woke up at 5 am to the blanket of snow over the cars and roads, I immediately started in…

Damn it, we might as well be just giving our money away.

I should just take Emmet out of school and go rent a place in Mexico for a month…

on and on, until my partner informed me he had never seen anyone so upset by the first snow day of the season.

Mind you, he had to go to work, using a wet tile saw out in the cold and never said peep.

Touché I thought. This is precisely the work I am coaching people on!

We waste countless, useful hours and brain energy commenting on and trying to change FACTS.

Circumstances of our life we literally have no control over.

The weather being one of them.

Elected officials already in office being another, the family you were born into, what other people choose to do or not do, the past, etc…

The thinking, complaining and trying to come up with impossible new scenarios is more of a waste of time than anything I wish to admit I have done.

Some will argue: but it makes me feel better to get it off of my chest.

Really, for me it perpetuates a feeling I don’t want.

I will give credit that vocalizing something can help to move on from it, just depends on the time inbetween.

The fact that I can focus on some feel good thoughts instead,

is a blessing and one of our greatest gifts, free will.

But think as you may.

I instead decided to stop the puffing and get to work with the couple of hours I did have of silence.

I am recording guided meditations for my 8 Week Coaching Program, from Problems to Power.

This requires focus and quiet.

It was still dark, so it was perfect.

I try my hardest to have my own morning meditation practice and this did the trick.

I don’t script my meditations to classes or clients.

I have an outline but work from deep within my creative connection to what is organic for me.

By the time I was done recording a beginning guide to watching the breath and conscious relaxation,

I was so chilled outl, it was amazing.

My own verbal expression of what is possible IF we focus our attention on something worthy brought the morning full circle.

My thoughts were slow,

my heart was open,

my body was soft.

I was ready for whatever this day had in store for me.

I try not to check my email too early, but I wanted to confirm the school’s closure,

which I did,

but,

I also found a message from an amazing wise woman who received my news letter that was scheduled for this exact morning, right around the time I started in about the snow day.

She thanked me for the inspiring words, and without knowing about what was going on with me,

reminded me of something she had just heard regarding insight of the dreaming aspect of the new moon.

That it is important to be inspired and move into your power and create a life of your dreams,

but to find that balance between ambition and limits.

In other words, what I planned on accomplishing today and what the facts were of my circumstance, was something I needed to figure out how to make the most of and work with.

You and I, we’re smart.

We can use our brains to create amazing, wonderful, out of this world things,

yet we are constantly baulky at that which is not ours to change.

I took Emmet on a sled ride down the street, in the glistening snow as the sun made it’s apprerence for awhile,

to remind me, there’s always a silver lining and there’s no rush.

Happiness is available to me now, when ever I seek it.

I just needed to find the thought to get me there.

There’s room for you here too.

Here’s to all the snow days, bring it on.

If this blog was useful to you, please let me know.

I can coach you through your own snow day.

Schedule a time HERE to set up a free mini session.

Oh the Thinks you can Think!

As the year comes to a close,

light is limited and

the working world slows a little to invite time for celebrating.

It is the perfect opportunity

to take the time now, while you have it,

to ask your self what is present for me?

We spend our days filling our minds with thoughts that distract us from our real goals.

It’s time, for me anyway, to stop the needless distraction,

and get focused on the nitty-gritty.

I often use the excuse that I can’t get real work done when I am home with my son.

But the truth is, if it is a priority, I can make a schedule that works.

What is important to you?

What problems would you like to solve?

What are the real “facts” about your situation

and what is created mind drama?

If you can sift through the BS of your mind,

you’ll find there is plenty ample opportunity

to spend your time in a way that produces the results you are looking for.

We distract our minds for many reasons.

One, because we are scared of failure,

and two, because when we get crystal clear about who is in charge,

there’s no one else to blame.

Failure is nothing but being in the exact same place a you are now,

except you have more information for the next attempt,

and you can at least say you tried.

When we do nothing, there’s no chance for success.

And self responsibility…it’s time to take your power back.

It’s actually very empowering,

to take the time, to manage your life

by managing your mind.

With practice we can choose what thoughts to think on propose.

Then we take responsibility for the choice of how to spend our time, money and energy.

I am empowering my self to talk less and reflect more.

To use the time I would be “venting” or expressing my self about my life,

and write, read or meditate.

With this I can better understand what thoughts are no longer of service.

I think it’s 100% necessary to self reflect if you are interested in growth, in any area of your life.

I have a ton of tools that can help you start thinking the thinks that are inline with the life you most desire.

Contact me to talk about Mind Body Coaching.

-Think! Think and wonder. Wonder and think. Oh the Thinks you can Think up, only if you try! (Dr. Seuss)

Do you know where you're growing?

2018 was an amazing year for me.

One of the more deliberate years in recent memory.

What I mean by that is,

I was in control of consciously creating my reality.

I did’t show up to the past unfolding over and over again.

This doesn’t mean I don’t have a routine or maintain a schedule,

it means I was in the active process of growing my brightest future.

I had many profound experiences.

A deep remembering of the path I am on.

The path is one of freedom and light.

One of unconditional love and compassion.

It is a path of growth, rather than change.

I see change as a compromise of who I am.

I see growth as the opportunity to become more of what is possible.

The way to do this is to understand where I’ve been and where I want to be.

No matter what, I am and will always be the perfection of the essence that is me.

We all are always perfect as is.

I seek growth to challenge the depths of this expreience.

The growth I am talking about is for more awareness.

It is not to have more happiness,

because I know that happiness available to me now,

at any point in the process.

Growing awareness is a lot of daily work of watching and maintaining the mind.

It’s the awareness that makes the time in between giving away your power and remembering you are the only one who can control your mind, shorter.

It’s the awareness that turns problems into power.

It’s evolutionary thinking.

We don’t need to grow to survive,

but let’s see what we’re capable of.

I’m in the planning stages of my 2019.

Everything’s coming up Mary, my best year yet.

I am going to guarantee it by practicing what it will feel like

when my dreams are actualized.

The feelings I will feel in 2019, my biggest growth year yet:

Impecable

Gathered

Flowing

Focused

Beaming

The work is now thinking in alignment with these feelings and qualities.

It’s going to be a wild ride.

I can not wait.

If you need some help planting your 2019 “ I’m on fire garden”',

let me know and we will schedule a mini coaching session.

The more we all grow, the brighter the glow.

Beginners Mind

Before you knew about a thing,

there was no judgement.

Especially in today’s western world,

we seem to be growing up quicker.

There is almost no choice.

Because of the continuous exposure to false pleasures, and pressures to be happy,

we want all of the things at a younger and younger age.

Growing up fast doesn’t mean you are better equipped emotionally,

in fact, I think the imbalance between societal maturity

and emotional intelligence is extremely harmful.

Beginners mind is a concept I have studied over the years through my yoga practice

and other eastern arts and philosophies.

It is an idea that we can shift our perspective

back to before the mind was jaded and judging,

look at the same situation, person or event

as though we are experiancing it for the first time.

This isn’t easy, but a great practice in mindful thinking.

Remembering we are in control of our thoughts in any moment.

The fact is, that each moment IS a new experience.

We prejudge so much of our life,

that we don’t allow ourselves the moments of wonder and awe we deserve,

and frankly, we are stripping that sweetness from the lives of our children.

I have a new motto in my house when things start to get a little crazy.

Stop, take a breath and smile.

It snaps you out of your normal ways of reacting

and allows for new, softer ways of responding to life.

It’s really a breath of fresh air to allow a sense of innocents back into your life.

This technique is very usefuly for our creative endeavors.

When practicing yoga, painting, playing music or even a walk you have taken 100 times,

can you step into the seat of curiosity?

What will be different this time if you are not just going through the motions?

You will be surprised about what shows up and it also takes pressure off of perfection.

Pick one thing you do regularly and for a month,

approach it with eyes wide open.

Christmas in Mexico

This is what I want the title of my memoir to be.

As it would be the ideal description of my life.

Sparkling lights.

Religious iconography.

Perfect sunsets.

And of course, margaritas.

I look for plane tickets to some location that is not my home usually weekly.

I never book a flight.

But knowing I could if I wanted to makes me somehow feel better.

That if all else fails,

I’ve got an out.

Wrong.

Fat chance.

I’ve been there, and done that,

too many times to count.

If I can live on the beach and teach yoga,

everything will be amazing.

If Im in a country steeped with cultural tradition and art,

I will feel more alive and connected to spirit.

Where siesta are encouraged,

and a 6 day work week is a way of life.

Where families live together and support one another

until it makes sense to go off on their own.

Everyone has their own “Christmas in Mexico”,

but we all know that;

where ever you go, there you are.

The, If I just had this one thing, then everything will be amazing, syndrome

is a way of life for many of us.

It’s only the momentary tequila buzz or sea breeze sun salutation

that convinces me it would change everything.

Running away to a new house, a new country, a new partner or a new job,

changes nothing about who you are on the inside.

How you control your thoughts.

How you stay motivated and encouraged.

How you offer compassion to yourself and others.

Unless you are in an abusive situation, you really can be happy anywhere

because emotions are based on thoughts, not circumstance.

Do you have preference? Yes.

Are there things that suite your skills better? Absolutely.

My mentor, Brooke Castillo, of The Life Coach School says, change nothing until you’re happy.

Other people and things don’t create your happiness, your thoughts do.

If you believe if free will,

then you should believe you have the freedom of what you choose to think.

Will people be jerks? Yep.

Will your job be boring? You can guarantee it.

But it still does not choose your thoughts for you.

I choose to find joy and contentment in the act of being alive.

If I have expectations of someone,

it is my responsibility to make sure they know that and are in agreement with it.

If I want to feel more successful with work and making meaningful connections,

I need to get my self out there and take a step in the direction of the greatness I seek.

It will not happen with me tucked away watching Netflix.

Be the bad ass boss that you are.

In control of your thoughts and feelings.

And then, when there are random acts of kindness in the world, bonus.

Trust me, when you start taking care of you the best,

leaving things in the world better than you found them,

you are in a state of allowing abundance to come your way.

Expect nothing, work your butt off and you will receive more than you ever thought possible.

This doesn’t mean I don’t plan on spending Christmas in Mexico,

because that sounds amazing.

But it might mean a Margarita in the snow may be a new tradition.

The happiness I seek only exists in one place.

And I don’t need to get on a plane to find it.

Salud!